Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2015 22:26:41 GMT -6
Apologies for brevity and typos, I am doing my best given my circumstances.
I left the "were community" not long after discovering it in 1997. I participated in the debate on what you wanted to call yourselves, and left in the comfort that the name was well chosen (were means human after all.)
I am quite glad I left the community and sought to understand my connection to wolves on my own. And had I not left the community, I would be a complete mess with far less understanding of myself.
Isolated from influence and especially those among you who would attempt to dictate to us what our connection is, and thus who we are, I was forced to answer my own questions.
My fislrst revelation occurred early on 3 March 2012 when I realized something I had suspected but didn't want to believe: that I was right, and everyone else was not. To clarify, I received independent confirmation that my opinions were valid, that there was something profoundly wrong with people, and that they were treating me poorly not because there was something wrong with me, but because they were affected by something.
What I also realized was that in my quest to 'earn the right to become a wolf' I had become a human being. To clarify, I realzed I had achieved my potential as a human being, something any psychologist or psychiatrist worth his muster would be highly interested in, especially considering I am at Universal Ethics, a level of moral development theorized to exist but of which no examples have been documented.
But understanding why I was motivated to be a wolf would take a lot longer to figure out, and likely only happened because I ledt the United States and its influence, which we shall address soon. I first needed to understand ego, then I needed my early childhood memories back. Ego was difficult and required my watching a movie about thirty times, then several weeks of contemplation. I do not yet fully understand my own psyche, but feel that I have a supressed paternal ego, a canid maternal personality, and that this personality, because it needs to be strong to protect me seeks to becone a wolf. I 'saw' my paternal personality/ego recently while divining with Salvia, and was quite frightened by it. My father was a violent man, but I supressed his influence over me when I was 6.
But the clincher for my understanding my wolf connection happened after I finally recovered thos early memories. I had been asking my mother for helo in this, as she had left us when I was about 5. She finally, accidently told me her reasoning, which allowed me to understand that my mother also was a psychopath, a person lacking empathy and thus moral reasoning (see Hare for psychopathy, Kohlberg for moral reasoning.) Almost instantly, my memories returned, as I had been previously trying to remember my loving mother.
My earliest memory will tell you a great deal about me, as I still do this... When I was four, the authorities tried to take me from my parents. My mother cried, and a as I was and am still both empathetic and a fool for bwlieving a psychopath, I lied because I preferred to suffer rather than hurt my mother's feelings.
My childhood would not improve. I was bullied and ostracized by everyone because of my intelligence. I was isolated by my brothers , and had no one to turn to when my father went on a violent tirade. Though memories are still incomplete, I recall hiding from my father with the family dog. This is important because I could not have learned empathy in many other ways. Given that mankind likely learned empathy from wolves (folks, the fact is, wolves taught us how to be human...), I believe this to be thw genesis of my connection to canines. Wolves, which I wasn't even aware of at that age, hadn't entered the picture yet.
When I was 12, I decided to move in with my mother. I did so because I felt like I didn't belong and wanted a loving family. I did not find what I was looking for, and subsequently resorted to the only identity I had known, and as I had finally been exposed to wolves, werewolves actually, guess what. Oh, and it happened during puberty, so all of my escape and sexual fantasies got intertwined and voila, a horny werewolf obsessed human was born.
I have always led two lives. After my trip to Idaho ("mainstream reason was to be a famous wolf photographer, secret reason was to become a wolf) I realized that if I became a wolf, I was gping to be shot and killed by some ignorant idiot. So, I left the were community for the wolf recovery field, in order to ensure I would be safe shouldz I succeed.
I now realize that my effort to become a wolf was the only legitimate life I have led. I have accomplished a great deal as a direct result of altering my life to suit my desire to become a wolf. I still do not fully understand how or why, but have spent my entire life preparing for what I am doing now.
Folks, what I have come to understand is that we were born into a society that enslaves us from birth and does so by taking away our humanity. My wolf is who I am, but it appears as a wolf because it is more human than we are within society. I am not part wolf (though honestly that may not be entirely true given my food allergies and the homozygous recessive gene fault that causes the allergies, which my mother doesn't appear to have eithwr gene bad.) What I am is a human being.
Allow me to explain.
Human beings are defined by empathy. Without empathy we cannot spontaneously develop moral reasoning. Our world is run by and we are forced to mimick the image of psychopaths, people who simply are not human. I believe my "wolf" is really my subconscious mind, oppressed by society, and which manifest as an oveewhelming desire to become a wolf, but which really drove me to be human.
How we are affected by this complicated disease process I have theorized rules all humanity is that it oppressses our humanity, what I consider as our advanced or human mind in order to cause us to resort to our primitive, or herd mind. It is thus my estimation that what some of you are experiencing is contact with your human mind, but which is oppressed by your ego.
I certainly do not understand any of you on am individual basis (though I understand people controlled by ego better than they understand themselves, which they are threatened by) and will not presume to judge your experience. What I will however suggest is that no one can tell you who you are, and that you should look to the community for support and possibly questions, but not answers.
It may help to understand that the "truth" is strictly limited to that which you discover for yourself and that believing anything you haven't discovered or verified yourself is faith, not truth.
My battery is dying, my fingers hurt, and my wolf is raging horny.
Please ask questions. I am highly intelligent but suffered brain damage. Any doubts you have about me are most certainly better answered with a question of me than an assumption of you about me.
Thank you for your time.
...
I left the "were community" not long after discovering it in 1997. I participated in the debate on what you wanted to call yourselves, and left in the comfort that the name was well chosen (were means human after all.)
I am quite glad I left the community and sought to understand my connection to wolves on my own. And had I not left the community, I would be a complete mess with far less understanding of myself.
Isolated from influence and especially those among you who would attempt to dictate to us what our connection is, and thus who we are, I was forced to answer my own questions.
My fislrst revelation occurred early on 3 March 2012 when I realized something I had suspected but didn't want to believe: that I was right, and everyone else was not. To clarify, I received independent confirmation that my opinions were valid, that there was something profoundly wrong with people, and that they were treating me poorly not because there was something wrong with me, but because they were affected by something.
What I also realized was that in my quest to 'earn the right to become a wolf' I had become a human being. To clarify, I realzed I had achieved my potential as a human being, something any psychologist or psychiatrist worth his muster would be highly interested in, especially considering I am at Universal Ethics, a level of moral development theorized to exist but of which no examples have been documented.
But understanding why I was motivated to be a wolf would take a lot longer to figure out, and likely only happened because I ledt the United States and its influence, which we shall address soon. I first needed to understand ego, then I needed my early childhood memories back. Ego was difficult and required my watching a movie about thirty times, then several weeks of contemplation. I do not yet fully understand my own psyche, but feel that I have a supressed paternal ego, a canid maternal personality, and that this personality, because it needs to be strong to protect me seeks to becone a wolf. I 'saw' my paternal personality/ego recently while divining with Salvia, and was quite frightened by it. My father was a violent man, but I supressed his influence over me when I was 6.
But the clincher for my understanding my wolf connection happened after I finally recovered thos early memories. I had been asking my mother for helo in this, as she had left us when I was about 5. She finally, accidently told me her reasoning, which allowed me to understand that my mother also was a psychopath, a person lacking empathy and thus moral reasoning (see Hare for psychopathy, Kohlberg for moral reasoning.) Almost instantly, my memories returned, as I had been previously trying to remember my loving mother.
My earliest memory will tell you a great deal about me, as I still do this... When I was four, the authorities tried to take me from my parents. My mother cried, and a as I was and am still both empathetic and a fool for bwlieving a psychopath, I lied because I preferred to suffer rather than hurt my mother's feelings.
My childhood would not improve. I was bullied and ostracized by everyone because of my intelligence. I was isolated by my brothers , and had no one to turn to when my father went on a violent tirade. Though memories are still incomplete, I recall hiding from my father with the family dog. This is important because I could not have learned empathy in many other ways. Given that mankind likely learned empathy from wolves (folks, the fact is, wolves taught us how to be human...), I believe this to be thw genesis of my connection to canines. Wolves, which I wasn't even aware of at that age, hadn't entered the picture yet.
When I was 12, I decided to move in with my mother. I did so because I felt like I didn't belong and wanted a loving family. I did not find what I was looking for, and subsequently resorted to the only identity I had known, and as I had finally been exposed to wolves, werewolves actually, guess what. Oh, and it happened during puberty, so all of my escape and sexual fantasies got intertwined and voila, a horny werewolf obsessed human was born.
I have always led two lives. After my trip to Idaho ("mainstream reason was to be a famous wolf photographer, secret reason was to become a wolf) I realized that if I became a wolf, I was gping to be shot and killed by some ignorant idiot. So, I left the were community for the wolf recovery field, in order to ensure I would be safe shouldz I succeed.
I now realize that my effort to become a wolf was the only legitimate life I have led. I have accomplished a great deal as a direct result of altering my life to suit my desire to become a wolf. I still do not fully understand how or why, but have spent my entire life preparing for what I am doing now.
Folks, what I have come to understand is that we were born into a society that enslaves us from birth and does so by taking away our humanity. My wolf is who I am, but it appears as a wolf because it is more human than we are within society. I am not part wolf (though honestly that may not be entirely true given my food allergies and the homozygous recessive gene fault that causes the allergies, which my mother doesn't appear to have eithwr gene bad.) What I am is a human being.
Allow me to explain.
Human beings are defined by empathy. Without empathy we cannot spontaneously develop moral reasoning. Our world is run by and we are forced to mimick the image of psychopaths, people who simply are not human. I believe my "wolf" is really my subconscious mind, oppressed by society, and which manifest as an oveewhelming desire to become a wolf, but which really drove me to be human.
How we are affected by this complicated disease process I have theorized rules all humanity is that it oppressses our humanity, what I consider as our advanced or human mind in order to cause us to resort to our primitive, or herd mind. It is thus my estimation that what some of you are experiencing is contact with your human mind, but which is oppressed by your ego.
I certainly do not understand any of you on am individual basis (though I understand people controlled by ego better than they understand themselves, which they are threatened by) and will not presume to judge your experience. What I will however suggest is that no one can tell you who you are, and that you should look to the community for support and possibly questions, but not answers.
It may help to understand that the "truth" is strictly limited to that which you discover for yourself and that believing anything you haven't discovered or verified yourself is faith, not truth.
My battery is dying, my fingers hurt, and my wolf is raging horny.
Please ask questions. I am highly intelligent but suffered brain damage. Any doubts you have about me are most certainly better answered with a question of me than an assumption of you about me.
Thank you for your time.
...
